I bought myself a Lego flower set on impulse. The kind of purchase that says "maybe this will help" without really believing it will.

It sat in the box for months. Proof that buying solutions doesn't work when you can't even open the box.

Then one Saturday afternoon, something shifted. I opened the box. Started sorting the pieces. And for the first time in months, my mind went quiet.

Why I'm Telling You This

I'm not sharing this because I think Lego solves grief. It doesn't.

But what happened as I built that flower set taught me something important about how we process loss. Something I now help my clients understand when they're struggling to move forward.

Here's what I noticed:

My hands were busy. My mind stopped spiralling.

Each completed section felt like a small win.

I wasn't thinking about the past or worrying about the future.

I was just... present.

That flower set became more than plastic bricks. It became permission to do something that didn't fix anything. That didn't need to mean anything. That was simply okay to enjoy.

And sometimes, that's exactly what grief needs.

The flower set took me about four hours to build. Four hours where grief wasn't consuming every thought. Four hours where I felt capable instead of broken.

That matters more than people realise.

Here's what I didn't expect: buying myself that Lego set, even though I couldn't touch it for months, was actually the first step. I was trying to give myself permission to do something that wasn't productive or meaningful. I just didn't have the energy to follow through yet.

That's how grief works. The desire comes before the ability.

Why Creativity Matters When You're Grieving

Most people think resolving grief is about talking through feelings or working through stages.

It's not.

Real grief work involves your whole body. Your hands. Your senses. Your creative brain.

Creative activities work because they:

Engage your hands and mind simultaneously. This stops the mental loops that keep you stuck.

Create something tangible. When everything feels broken, making something whole matters.

Require no emotional explanation. You don't need to justify why you're building Lego or arranging flowers.

Give you small wins. Completing each step proves you can finish something.

What Nobody Tells You About Processing Loss

Society gives you terrible advice about grief.

"Keep busy." "Time heals." "Stay strong."

All rubbish.

Here's what actually helps: doing activities that let you feel without having to explain.

Building. Creating. Making. These aren't distractions from grief. They're doorways to processing what words can't capture.

Your brain needs multiple pathways to process loss. Talking is one. Creating is another. Moving your body is another. You need all of them, not just talking.

The Thing About Lego and Life After Loss

Building that flower set didn't fix my grief.

But it reminded me of something important: I could still create beauty. I could still complete something. I could still find moments of peace.

Those realisations matter when you're grieving because:

You start believing you can do other things too.

Small accomplishments rebuild confidence.

You remember you're not completely broken.

You find proof that joy still exists.

The flowers now sit on my shelf. Not as a memorial. Not as a symbol of anything deep. Just as flowers. Bright. Cheerful. Built one brick at a time when I needed something to do with my hands.

Sometimes that's enough.

When Creative Activities Aren't Enough

I need to be honest with you.

Creative activities help. They're part of recovery. But they're not the whole answer.

If you're struggling with unresolved grief, you might notice:

Activities that used to bring joy feel pointless.

You can't concentrate long enough to finish anything.

Everything feels heavy, even simple tasks.

You're going through the motions but not really living.

That's your signal to get professional support.

The difference between feeling temporarily better and actually resolving grief is having the right knowledge, tools, processes and guidance. Creative activities soothe. Structured effective grief work heals.

What to Do Next

If building Lego or doing something creative sounds impossible right now, that tells you something important about where you are emotionally.

Start here:

Take my free Grief Assessment Quiz to understand what's really going on beneath the surface. It takes 8-10 minutes. You'll get immediate insights plus a personalised report showing exactly where you're stuck and what might help.

If creative activities sound appealing but you can't find the energy (like me with that Lego set), start smaller than you think you need to:

Choose something simple (colouring book, basic craft kit, easy recipe).

Set a timer for 10 minutes.

Give yourself permission to stop whenever.

Notice how you feel during and after.

No pressure to finish or make it meaningful.

The goal isn't to create something perfect. It's to give your grief somewhere to go whilst your hands are busy.

If you're ready for professional grief support:

Book a free 15-minute clarity call to discuss whether my Handling Grief Programme might help. We'll talk about what you're experiencing, what's not working, and whether structured grief work is right for you.

You don't need to spend years processing loss. You don't need endless therapy. You need the right knowledge, tools, processes and guidance, and permission to move forward.

One Brick at a Time

That Lego flower set sits on my shelf now. It took months between buying it and building it. That delay wasn't weakness. It was my grief timeline.

Yours might be different. That's okay.

The important bit? I eventually opened the box. Started sorting pieces. Built something.

You can too. One brick at a time.